That awkward moment when.

So I finally get my rear in gear this semester. Decide to be productive and waltz all the way up to campus (15 minutes in the 5 degree weather, mind you), find a fat, squishy sofa, plop down into it, and kick off my shoes. I had liquid and solid fuel to last me the next four hours, I had classical music blaring out of my headphones, I was ready to go.

So here I am, 45 minutes later and four pages into this article I still did not understand, just thinking to myself how I could not have made a comfier sofa if I tried, and I notice a girl waltz up and pop a squat right on the other end of my sofa. How rude! The whole room is empty, I counted 13 empty tables, 7 free sofas, and a booth, yet she chose to pop her presumptuous rear into my study bubble. Fifteen minutes passed by, three more girls decided to settle themselves into the couches across from me and next to me, whilst the rest of the room continued to remain empty.

Not about to lose my ground, I wriggled myself even deeper into the sofa's warm, cozy depths, and turned up a beautiful orchestral piece from Pride and Prejudice, determined not to let these obstinate girls ruin my Wednesday afternoon.

Another 15 minutes later I looked up to find myself surrounded my around 10 girls, standing or sitting in a tight circle around me. Oh, also, they were all looking at me.

One man was shaking a sheet of paper in my face saying, "you ready to begin cashier training?"

No. I most certainly was not. And I was most certainly not happy about this group choosing my couch to meet around. And it was most certainly the most awkward moment ever.



My couch :(

I was just thinking too much

Duuudddeeee...

Class. The last semester of college classes for me actually. Have I cried? Yes, puddles.

So I went to class today, which happened to be with my freshman roommate/bff/redheaded goddess/significant other. That was exciting in itself. The second most exciting part of that class, however, was the professor, who seemed to have it as together as a freshman on the Link (our school bus...inside joke, sorry). In other words, he did not have it together.

Don't get me wrong, I love professors who go on tangents. Not only do they say some pretty interesting things, I've learned a trick where I just give them a topic to talk about that's not academic related, after which I settle back in my chair and give my eyes a little snoozy (clever, eh?).

Anywho, he got to talking about the last time he had taught that particular class, during which he had some sort of attack and ended up on the floor. And then the hospital. And I'm thinking to myself, "Is this a warning? Is he expecting any of us to be medically trained? Should I have learned CPR prior to this class?" I then scanned the room searching for some able-bodied young adults who looked like they would be able to take control of the situation should the event call for it.

My point is, I've never heard a professor tell me that the last time he had tried to teach that particular class, he didn't make it through the whole thing.

He also mentioned that he didn't have anything prepared for class because he had been "thinking way too much." Can I please use that? How intelligent would I sound if I told one of my profs that I couldn't finish my assignment on account of thinking myself into a dither?

As an aside, why do I freaking always get an itch on my head the moment my professor asks the class a question? Inevitably, it gets misinterpreted as a raised hand, each and every time.

#college #seniorproblems #notstudyingabroad #thisismylife #iwishihadmoreinterestingthingstoblogabout

#laughatprofessorswhodontknowwhattheyredoing

Pride goeth before a fall

I mean, you're pretty good looking, so that's 50% of the work

Thank you. I like to think I am. I mean, I'm hot as s***.

....you might want to use a better metaphor.

 

Laffalittle.

Heil!

There's this classmate of mine, this lovely specimen of a fellow, who must have a skewed perception of social norms and...our relationship? See, most people greet other people like this:

Sometimes like this...

Maybe this?

Occasionally....this.



But this person. Is the first person who has ever saluted me. 

Life is strange...

Social lubricant.

You just can't take your friends anywhere.

My lovelies planned a surprise visit to the local brewery for my birthday last Saturday.

The first part of the reason this is funny is because....well...I don't know how to say this....my body had already had enough of the liquid they were offering me the night before. Surprise bathroom visit.

However, mouths loosen up when beer is added to the equation. Not my mouths.

Mi amiga was chatting up the bartender, talking about good ol' times and beverage preferences. Amiga starts a conversation with the following words:

"So I like beer now, but freshman year my drink of choice wa....."

"I mean....."

"After I TURNED 21, my drink of choice was..."

*awkward drunk giggles and silence*

Social lubricant.

That's all.

The People We Love

As a few of my lovely friends and I were chatting around a beer, the Hobbit release came up (as we were planning a major LOTR marathon the day before).

One of my friends goes, "What is the Hobbit? I have no idea what it even is."

Blank stares.

Facepalm.

"Oh girl."

"What?? It's like the last Harry Potter movie, right?"

...


Laugh at the people you love.

Manders

Sleep Monster

My sleep deprivation has developed in stages since the dawn of my college career. It started out simple and innocent, missing a few hours here and there, but catching up on the weekends. Eventually, I started pulling all-nighters, sometimes quite frequently but it was fine because I was still young and versatile. Come junior year, I avoided sleep like the plague. Someone once told me that a sleep cycle (4 hours) is enough to function on. That person was so right and so wrong.

This year, I am an old person. Now, in my venerable old age, I have started spiking my coffee with coffee and having sleep-deprived manic panic attacks and early onset bedtime symptoms (which means, I started going to bed during class, piano lessons, morning jogs, and other relaxing activites of the sort).

My body has begun to fight back. It will be robbed of its precious sleep times no longer!!
I don't really know how to accurately describe what's happening here, but it's like my body and conscience have schemed together and created some sort of subconscious, demanding, spiteful alterego. So in the mornings, I try to wake up with enough time to get adequate sustenance and at least spend enough time in ths shower, but my alterego will not let me. It's not like it shuts me down and forces me to sleep through an alarm, it's like it shuts me down and takes over to get out of bed and TURN OFF all four of the alarms I set in the morning before putting me right back to bed.

I HAVE A JOB TO BE AT. I HAVE CLASSES TO ATTEND. THIS ISN'T FUNNY!

I tried changing my alarm tone, I tried setting even MORE alarms (ridiculous, right?), I tried putting my alarm on the other side of the room, despite having to wake my sleeping roommate. I've tried everything people.

Also, it knows what it's doing. It doesn't just let me sleep past my alarms, it wakes me up precisely 15 minutes before I have to be at class/work. Every single morning. Which leaves me just enough time to put a bra on and grab a bagel. I'm gonna be honest, it's best not to venture too close to me these days, because the likelihood of me brushing my teeth any given morning is slim.

laffalittle.

Manders